I'm looking at adoption forums trying to get ideas from others who have adopted, but all there seem to be are imbittered biological parents trying to force the fact of what they gave up and how much pain they are in and what are their rights.
Well first off.. UM you gave up your child (hopefully in the child's best interest) you have no rights. My own biological mother tried to get my medical records from the hospital a few years ago and they wouldn't grant her access to them and she didint' understand why. Well, her rights were terminated by the state.
Next, I keep seeing the term "first mother" "First Parents'" YUCK!!! It's biological mother/parents. END OF STORY. I remember when I was little I referred to my biological mom as my real mom and my adopted mom was not a happy camper. She quickly said, "I'm your real mom." Very true. I see why she said that now.
Open Adoption can be a positive thing if clear rules are made. I don't want my child to have a step mother/father like relationship with their biological parents. However, I think they need to know the reality of their background so they are not disillusioned.
Counseling: I desperatly want the biological family to have counseling. I don't want her to go through her life wondering "what if?" The reason she'd give the baby up is so she and the baby would have a better life.
2 comments:
Good post Jamie. I'm so glad you brought up that subject. Adoption was the best thing that happened to me. I'm sure you feel the same. I know that meeting my bio mom was probably more healing to her than it was to me. I was so content already. She however worried until the time I met her if she'd made the right decision. I'm glad I have met her and have a friendship with her, but she knows that she is not my mom. Are you thinking about this as an option? Hope you guys are doing well. Love ya!
Yes, we are thinking about it, but I am sooooo overwhelmed with it. The more I delve in to it I find out how much competition there is and with some of these odviously richer families I don't feel like I can compete. I mean I'm competing for a BABY. Thats just so bazaar.
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